You might be excited about the news that you're pregnant, particularly if you've been trying to have a baby. You may be surprised by it if your pregnancy is unexpected. You may even feel angry or upset.

If it is an unplanned pregnancy, you or your partner might need longer to adjust to the news.

When to tell people you're pregnant?

There is no correct answer – it's up to you to decide what's best for you and your partner.

Some women announce their pregnancy as soon as they find out they are pregnant. Some women prefer to wait until the end of the first trimester when the risk of miscarriage decreases. It's your baby, so it's your decision.

The following questions may help you figure out what's right for you.

Who should I tell first, and how?

You can disclose with your immediate family members such as parents, who will be available to support you through the first few weeks of pregnancy.

Family members and close friends may expect you to share your happy news personally with them. Social media platforms may not be the best choice to announce your pregnancy.

When do I tell my elder child?

You might decide not to tell your elder child until the pregnancy's further along. Once you've decided to tell your child, it's a good idea to get them involved by:

  • Talking about how the baby is growing inside your tummy
  • Letting them feel your tummy
  • Showing them where the baby will sleep after birth
  • Asking them to help choose clothes and toys for their baby brother/sister
  • Reading a book together about a new baby to help them understand what's going to happen

Like you, your child may also need some time to adjust to the idea of having another baby. You may want to prepare yourself for questions like-

  • Will you still love me?
  • Will you still have time to play with me?
  • Will I still have my room?

Don't worry if your child is unhappy about the new baby. It's usually the shock of such a significant change.

When should I tell my employer?

It's best if your employer hears the news straight from you. Tell your employer as early as possible, giving both you and them enough time to make adjustments to your working arrangements. The sooner your employer knows, the easier it will be to 

  • Plan your maternity leave
  • Take time off for antenatal appointments

When should I tell my colleagues?

 You may want to tell your colleagues after you have told your boss. It also depends on how you feel; for instance, if you've got morning sickness, you may need to tell your colleagues sooner.

References

1. Better Health Channel. Pregnancy stages and changes [Internet]. Available at: https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/health/HealthyLiving/pregnancy-stages-and-changes. Accessed on Aug 27, 2020.

2. Healthdirect Australia. Pregnancy, birth and baby. When to tell people you are pregnant [Internet]. Available at: https://www.pregnancybirthbaby.org.au/when-to-tell-people-you-are-pregnant. Accessed on Aug 27, 2020.

3. NHS Inform. Ready Steady Baby. When to tell people you're pregnant [Internet]. Available at: https://www.nhsinform.scot/ready-steady-baby/pregnancy/your-baby-s-development/when-to-tell-people-youre-pregnant. Accessed on Aug 27, 2020.